Hahahaha!

Did you know that when someone annoys you, it takes forty-two muscles to frown, But it only takes four muscles to extend your arm out and smack'em in the head?

Trolley Dolly

What did I learn today?

• Never skip Kevin's room with the Canteen Trolley - He doesn't move fast but he will track you down.
• The trolley run consists of 1 hour ambling up and down corridors, 1/2 hour standing in corridors trying to figure out which way we were heading, 1 hour searching for lost wallets and purses (daughters seem to steal a lot of them) and 1 hour calculating and recalculating and recalculating the price of the two items you are calculating. (Thinking I should be able to shorten the trolley run by about 1.5 hours simply by walking at a reasonable pace, remembering which direction I am heading in and knowing how to calculate change in my head quickly.)
• Your Bingo Partner will always remember you and be in a great mood on the day you don't work with her!
• Everyone wants chocolate!
• Those with a sense of humour will be waiting in the lounge every Mon in the hope that you will roll the trolley getting it out of the lift!
• Most of the Auxiliary Ladies have worse memories than most of the Patients.
• If you get your toes run over by the trolley it really hurts!
• Putting your feet up with a coffee and a smoke in the staff garden at the end of a shift is really quite therapeutic.

I love this job! What a hoot!

How To Dial 000

I have just been crawling around and around and around the couch in my living room on my hands and knees chasing my son. About five minutes into this hilarious game I have pulled muscle in my neck and can no longer move my left arm or turn my head. So I have pleaded game over and sent my son to bed with Transformers 2 to watch on his portable DVD player. About two minutes later he reappears.

Son - Mummy, where does it hurt?

Mummy - All the way up here.

Son - Well, just let me know if the pain moves down and you have trouble breathing, because I know the ambulance number and I have my phone.

Mummy - OK sweetie, I don't think that will be necessary, but thank you. Now off to bed! 

Son - Makes an appearance 2 mins later carrying 'Emergency First Aid For Parents -  Actually Mummy, the movie is really loud and I probably won't hear you so you will have to call yourself. The number is here on the front of this book.

Yep, thanks son! You are really cute but Go To Bed!

 

 

Fun, Games and Dementia

Well I made it through my first full day at the NH and I am totally exhausted. Not physically but mentally. The morning was fairly easy as I was assisting with the art classes - fetching supplies, changing water, getting cups of coffee and generally giving moral support as I know nothing about painting. This will be a regular Friday Gig.
After NH Fish and Chips for lunch (not bad either) it was back to set up for the afternoon game. Last week I learnt how to play Bingo, this week was Hoy. So I paired up with my partner from last week Hilda and we actually won the first hand!!!! Not sure who was more excited, her or me! Last week I believe I called her a Cantankerous Old So And So, well I am changing that to Cheating Cantankerous Old So And So. Boy did I have to keep an eye on her. At one stage I said 'No, that was not the card that was called' only to be told 'I KNOW but I am sick of losing every game!' so I promptly reminded her that we won the first and turned the card back over which was greeted with a big 'Hmmmppphhhh' and lots of sniggers from those with hearing good enough to follow what was going on. There were quite a few occasions where I could not look up at my supervisor for fear that we would both start laughing. Well she stayed for the whole round again, so points to me!! 

Hilda 0 - Bingo Girl 2

More Therapy

Mini Mushrooms

Back Lake

Ripples in the Sand

Rollercoaster

What a roller-coaster of a week! Some really shitty moments, but some amazing feel-good moments too! The past and present have certainly been contrasting each other!

Which I guess is a good thing as it reminds me why I left the life I had 6 months ago and why I love my new one. I have tried to use the whole experience as motivation to continue on towards my goals and I guess, mostly succeeded. The negatives of the week are now learning experiences to propel me forward and those feel-good moments are being cherished in the hope that there will be more of the same in the future. 

Grays Anatomy

I took my son out to dinner last night because I was simply way too tired to think about cooking. He had had enough to eat when I was less than half way through so to stop him from getting fidgety I decided to give him my iPhone to play with and in the absence of any games loaded the Grays Anatomy app. He was super stoked  and sat there happily looking at body parts while I enjoyed my dinner and glass of red and answered the odd random question. After about half an hour I saw someone I knew and stood up to talk to her, completely forgetting about what my son was doing. About five minutes into the conversation the phone is thrust under our noses and the question asked. 'What is that?' He was up the Female Reproductive System External Organs picture. She just about choked and I had one of those moments when the whole world seems to slow down, but managed to say in my best Mummy tone 'How about we just skip that chapter for now?' to which the reply came back 'Don't worry Mummy I've already looked at all of the pictures of the doodles!' and at that half the restaurant turned and looked at the two speechless women and the small boy clutching the iPhone.